By Dan Kennedy • The press, politics, technology, culture and other passions

Kerry and Romney for vice president

In my latest for the Guardian, I try to make the case that John Kerry and Mitt Romney make the most sense as running mates for the Democratic and Republican tickets.

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  1. Don, American

    Is that some kind of Massachusetts pride? (I promise to be more politically correct from now on.)

  2. Aaron Read

    Ugh! God, okay, so I’m young and stupid…but reading your article Dan, one thing kept running through my mind over and over: Dick Cheney has so ably demonstrated, the Veep job in the modern age is best filled with an attack dog. Someone who can say and do what the President can’t because he’s the President…and given the s**t Dubya says and does, that says a LOT about what Cheney can and does do!With that in mind, I can sort-of see Romney as VP. He’s slimy-yet-telfon enough to say anything and everything, no matter how despicable or ass-backwards, to help McCain win. And yeah, he’s filthy rich (something that’d help McCain a lot after the first week of September) and he’s young which helps negate the McCain being old issue.But Kerry for Obama? Gimme a break. Kerry would attack an chainsaw-wielding speed freak by boring him to death with essays so tortured with “nuance” they make Abu Ghraib look like a country club.Plus Kerry is one thing and one thing only in the eyes of America: a LOSER. He lost, be it fairly or unfairly, and there is NO getting around that perception.And let’s not forget that Obama is basing his candidacy on a “new wave of politics from a new wave of politicians” (so to speak). It’s pretty hard to get more “old guard” than Kerry. I mean, my God, Kerry will be lucky to win his next re-election to the Senate, and you’re suggesting he be on the ticket?!? Are you TRYING to get McCain elected?God, I think Biden’s as stupid a choice for Obama as My-Favorite-Republican, Democrat-Joe-Lieberman was for Gore…but two wrongs don’t make a right. Stephen Colbert would be a better choice for VP than either of them, frankly…and yes, that’s meant to sound as ridiculous as it does.Although, hell…you wanna get the youth vote? Put Colbert on the ticket and you’d get 90% of the 18-24 demo AND probably increase turnout by 50%. Is he completely unqualified for the job? Of course, but since when has that mattered to voters?In all seriousness, though…I put the odds at 5 to 1 that Obama has secretly worked a deal with Colbert to “announce” him as his VP for one day just to freak everyone out and get tons of media attention. They’ll let it stew for 24 hours, and then Colbert will (completely in character) announce that while he’s honored by Obama for the chance to serve, the cut in pay would just be too much, and instead Colbert has recommended (whoever the real pic is) to Obama instead and Obama agreed. It’d be a brilliant media stunt to say the least.

  3. Tony

    Dan, you needed a subhead, something like “Flip-floppers could be just the tickets …” Hah!

  4. O'Rion

    Mitt would be fine. He’d take on the truely miserable role of doing and saying anything even though he knows McCain thinks he’s scum. But the lame Kerry for VP garbage, floated by Keller and pimped by Drudge is a nonstarter. And the tribe of local TV politicos(4,7,25) who leered with such delight over the photo with Kerry posing with the young women on that dock in Nantucket, looked like jerks.

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